Platonic friends

We've all had our fair share of short-term relationships; one's that lasted maybe a month or two, also known as a "fling." Smile, you know you've had one. Throughout your dating life you’re going to have relationships that are short and long term, some serious and not-so-serious. However, in between all of your relationships and maybe even during, did you ever have a friend who was always there for you in more ways then one?

This scenario can go both ways for a guy or girl. This friend could get your mind off of your girl or guy problems, they were easy to talk to and have fun with, you always felt comfortable around them and sometimes engaged in sexual activities. Wait, what?

You have sex with them? Well, that makes them a little more then just a friend. I’ll allow you the freedom to label what you would call this type of friend but that’s beside the point. It’s easy to maintain this type of physical relationship with this “friend” when you’re in between relationships or in one of those “flings.” Eventually, and this will happen as you get older, you’re going to enter a relationship that is more serious then all the rest. The one where you think he/she is the “one,” whether it works out or not.

Once you get to this point in your life you’re going to have to make a decision about that friend of yours you have. You know the one you have sex with. If this new relationship you’ve entered is getting serious and is certainly more real then all those flings from the past, you’re not going to want to jeopardize it by remaining intimate with your side buddy. In other words, you don’t want to be a cheater. Therefore, talking with your friend one on one is the most mature thing to do.

First off, it’s important you both come to an agreement that you’re going to remain friends without the physical activities. If either one of you feel you can’t be friends without having sex, then you really weren’t true friends in the first place. It’s also extremely immature to write someone off, especially a friend who’s been there for you, just because you’re no longer intimate.

All fully functioning (mature) adults in society should be able to maintain a healthy relationship with a true friend without anything physical; it’s called platonic friends, duh. It’s also important to still have your hangout time with this person whether your new relationship partner is involved or not.

Here’s where it can get complicated. How do you let your new boyfriend/girlfriend know about this good friend? It’s real simple, be honest!

Ok, maybe not that complicated as long as you’re up front with your new partner. If you try to hide this friend and go behind your partner’s back to see them, you might as well call it cheating. The serious relationship you’ve established should have trust; otherwise, it’s not serious and defeats the entire purpose of this article. As long as you have this key ingredient (trust), you should have no problem telling your significant other about your close friend. In fact, make an effort to spend time all together. In return, your partner should feel at ease and not threatened by the friend you have nor get upset if you want to spend time with your pal one on one.

The last piece to this puzzle is of course telling your significant other if you’ve had sex with this friend. If you don’t feel you’re far enough along in your relationship to disclose that type of information, by all means, wait until you’re ready. Remember, honesty and trust are key, talking to your partner and including them in all aspects of your life is important. Whenever you decide to tell your other-half about your friend, be honest and assure them you strictly have a platonic relationship regardless of what you’ve done with this person in the past.